Guilty pleasures is what we're talking about, but I have to admit that I've always had a bit o... more..

Guilty pleasures is what we're talking about, but I have to admit that I've always had a bit of thing for Pierce Brosnan. I know it's not cool, but he just seems like a really fantastic bloke. Suave, sensible and intelligent, probably doesn't fart in bed and fucking gorgeous to boot. The clue is in the name, which is his real name apparently. Pierce, that'll be the Irish charm from his mum, and Brosnan, that'll be the smouldering Eastern European good looks from his dad. He's got them both, and a pair of twinkling Irish eyes set in a chiselled continental face sets me all of a flutter, and he's not at all a bad actor either.

I know they said he didn't quite have the right degree of menace for James Bond, (unlike Roger Moore. Pardon??) but he was suave as fuck and would certainly know how to fix a proper dry martini and treat a girl right, which is more than I can say for that brute Daniel Craig, who almost certainly also farts in bed.

OK, so he's lost his Bond gig, but he can't be short of a bob or two, and he's still working, and still popular, so what on earth is he doing in this ad? It's just awful, I can't bear to watch it, here's the man of my dreams acting like a complete knob.

I can only console myself with the possibility that he has done it for charity. I know I'm clutching at straws here, but there is some verbiage at the front of the commercial, where Pierce rumbles on about things he believes in, before we clumsily segue into the man-face-cream pitch. I'm just hoping that this might mean that he's got L'Oreal to fork out a load of cash for some worthy cause of which he is a patron. Please tell me this is true, I just can't deal with it otherwise.

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